Being Misunderstood
scott.m.liddell |
I've kept a journal of sorts
An archive of emotions
And was prompted to retract time
Scanning... scanning through memories
When I come across one
That claws for my attention
Titled: Misunderstood
"I'm surrounded by a room full of people, yet I feel loneliness inside.
All are familiar, kind faces that I love. They don't get me though"
Yep... I remember
I recall this one in particular
So I read, I retreat
I read with compassion
For the woman who wrote it
For the time and place she was in
"I want to let someone in.
I want to be understood"
For the woman I still am
"They see the me that I want them to see. They see the smile I want them to see.
Nobody knows me with just one look. Not one can tell with just a glance. "
Yes... I determine
She most certainly "gets" me
My state of mind
Desperate
To
Connect
Thirsting
For them to
Realize
Somethings never change
And I've still not discovered
Someone... anyone
Who sees past my play
Dana
* Written for dVerse ~ You can read my post Misunderstood that inspired the poem- here.
~ Please leave me your thoughts below. You can also connect with me on Twitter and Facebook.
this speaks to me of the deep desire that i think we all have...to be found..to be seen, to have people break through the facade even if we fear it in a way.. real and honest write dana
ReplyDeleteUltimately we all want to be understood don't we? And yet often one of the reasons we turn to creativity is because we simply can't find our place and its seems the only way to find our voice. Great to go back to your journal.
ReplyDeleteJournals are so important to revisit and wonder at who you were when the pain was scribbled. Poem taps well with those memories
ReplyDeleteWonderful idea here, and very well executed. Agree with Claudia's comment all the way...
ReplyDeleteI like the dialogue you set up with your old self. I have got to get out my own boxes of journals! I fear having changed so much that the old selves will seem like different people, and also fear noting a lack of change like yours (or this fictional one--if the narrator is not you). Moments like this:
ReplyDelete"I read with compassion
For the woman who wrote it
For the time and place she was in
"I want to let someone in.
I want to be understood"
For the woman I still am"
Are just gorgeous as you recognize your experience. And heartbreaking as you note the place where you/we wait for explorers to discover us instead of inviting them in:
"Desperate
To
Connect
Thirsting
For them to
Realize"
It must have hurt too much to trust again after the first time?
Amazing. So raw and vulnerable. I just love this part: "They see the me that I want them to see. They see the smile I want them to see. Nobody knows me with just one look. Not one can tell with just a glance. "
ReplyDeleteSounds like you could've been writing about me. I can so relate!
ReplyDeleteall too real...we have many an artificial relationship that surrounds us and we long for that one or two that really understands us...that we can trust to be real with...i feel you...my best friend here just moved away and its hard to find another...
ReplyDeleteI like the reflections on the past through journals, and seeing how we are now. I can also relate to your words as I think we are still discovering ourselves ~
ReplyDeleteThat's actually the reason I began this blog... to rediscover myself. I use to know exactly who I was, faults and all.Now, not so much.
DeleteI think most of us have been in the place you describe - the pressures to act out a role - I feel for you - you have really nailed this complex feeling in your poem
ReplyDeletethank you for the voice from within
ReplyDeleteyou are not alone in the feeling
Oh my goodness... I appreciate all of your comments and understanding more than you will ever know. I say that a lot, but it's true! Your words warm my heart with love and relief at having others who know how I feel.
ReplyDeleteI love the honesty and authenticity of this.
ReplyDeleteThis speaks to me - when I feel lonely, particularly in large crowds, I dub it "my existential loneliness," and to be a writer, an artist, or just one who cares mightily about the welfare of the human race, I suspect we must feel this. Loved th epost
ReplyDeleteGosh I can def. see myself in your words. I think this is magic because you've created such a strong empathy with practically anone who read it. Beautifully done Dana!
ReplyDeleteDana I love this poem. I relate so much with this part, "They see the me that I want them to see. They see the smile I want them to see. Nobody knows me with just one look. Not one can tell with just a glance."
ReplyDelete- Terri